This is a story of frustration beyond belief and the worst day of my life...ever.

It is a story about misandry, misunderstandings and domestic violence. For the part that is comical, fine, for the nightmare I found myself in, beyond belief.

I had had an affair of the heart with my ex-girlfriend and friend, and we had a fight.

I had floated her old love letters down the creek to make a point that I found her behaviour domineering and quite abusive.

Which was all okay from what I was told, so I thought nothing more of it.

Cool. Home and hosed, messages clear.

Then I slipped up. Thinking all was quite cool, I asked my ex out for a cup of coffee.

Long story short, I arrived at that meeting and was assaulted.

Realising my mistake I tried to level with this person. Speak on equal terms.

More abuse.

I had had enough. A witness to murder as a child and not having said anything of previous abuse I gave fight.

Mistake number two.

More ammunition.

In the end, we spoke on the phone and, believe it or not, I was asked to "get help", because my ex was too.

So I did.

I went to see a counsellor, and this is what led to the worst day of my life.

At my first visit, I outlined the story, and immediately the counsellor, a woman, said to me "Oh...a bit on the side hey?"

I'm thinking, "No. It was not a bit on the side it was a platonic relationship".

I'm saying to her "No. It was not a bit on the side, it was a platonic relationship", and attempted to bring the counsellor around to what I was there for...empathy for having been assaulted.

I explained that I felt vilified as a man, but that it was not something I had ever allowed myself to get into before, having witnessed domestic-violence-murder as a child.

I brought the counsellor emails from my ex demonstrating the abuse and aggressive behaviour.

And then the words came out of her mouth: "Why do you want me to think she is as bad as you are?"

It takes a lot to make me angry. I have complete mastery over my body and spirit.

I excused myself and said that this would be the final visit (there were four and on the previous three I wasn't getting much empathy for my pain and suffering).

I was in cognitive dissonance. Vilified once by my ex, vilified again by the counsellor. Not someone who I believed deserved such vilification.

As I walked out to my car, the counsellor followed me...we were talking.

And then the frustration of not being shown any empathy or sympathy showed on my face as I contacted and felt the pain of being hurt.

And what did the counsellor do? She looked at me with venom and said, "Oooohhhh, you're going to get into so much trouble".

Me? There I was, on behest of the person who assaulted me, attempting to meet that person's needs and get some sympathy and empathy and actual counselling, vilified a third time. As you can imagine, this made me actually very angry.

I got in my car, and left.

Vilification of men is not acceptable. Domestic violence and assault are not acceptable. Violence against men, by women, is not acceptable. Apportioning blame on men for domestic violence is not acceptable.

So, where are things now?

I would say that at this point in time there is a healthy appreciation in my near-life-long-friend and respect and understanding. I would like to feel and think that there is mutual understanding and respect.

Let's face it. I did float those old love letters down the creek, effectively picking a fight...by telling my ex about it.

I was not purely innocent. However, there are two victims to domestic violence and it is not acceptable to blame men, as the whole point of floating those old letters down the creek was to send a signal..."Your aggression and hostility is affecting my world. This cannot go on".

My concern, and the reason for this article is that if we are not careful, we end up in a world where violence against men, by women, is acceptable, and the very mention of the word, 'anger', by a man is an excuse for vilification.

Everyone must accept responsibility for domestic violence and word together to find means and solutions to avoid it in the first place, which I tried unsuccessfully to do.

Thank you for reading. As time permits I will write more on domestic violence and criminality. It means a lot to me because as an ostensible 'victim' of domestic violence as a child, having witnessed domestic-violence-murder, I can say that it was a complete surprise to me that I ended up in that situation.

That last meeting with that unsympathetic counsellor...easily the worst day of my life. Ever.

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